Friday, January 6
Last night was RIDICULOUS. A few of us went out to the locals’ pub in Derry, just outside the walled city and had an interesting experience…we were chatting with some of the folks that regularly frequent the pub and all was well. I had a somewhat difficult conversation with a fellow named Gerry, an older gentleman that was easily the most shmammered in the whole bar, which went just fine until later on…between his level of intoxication, the loud music, and my “accent” he didn’t quite understand most of what I said to him. After leaving to chat with some other people we met from Derry, Gerry later walked past and pulled me aside and slurred, “Ehh laddy, you talking’ sheitt?” Of course, my response was “No” since I hadn’t spoken with the old drunk since earlier. He then threatened me by shaking his fists in regular intervals. Needless to say, he was being completely ridiculous, especially for a sixty year old man - that just wouldn’t have been a fair fight haha. It was just so weird because I had done nothing to rile him up! So in the interest of keeping Gerry’s name an infamous one, here is my Ode to Gerry:
Ah the old Irishman. Drunken, slovenly, grumpy old man. Why do you threaten me so? I see your unkempt hair and understand you just fine, yet my words are lost to you. Is it generational? Is it cultural differences? Alas, it turns out that your words stem merely from your continual drunkenness. The other pub dwellers know you well and observe your unconfined need to fight EVERYONE there. So, perhaps it is time that you went back to school, learned English, and returned to me for that much needed hug that you so badly desire. In the eternal words of one of your drinking songs:
Just give me your hand,
Tabhair dom do lámh.
Just give me your hand
And I’ll walk with you,
Through the streets of our land,
Through the mountains so grand.
If you give me your hand.
Just give me your hand,
And come along with me.
Will you give me your hand,
And the world it can see,
That we can be free,
In peace and harmony?
From the north to the south.
From the east to the west.
Every mountain, every valley,
Every bush and birds nest!
